Paul Up Late

Lunch

2008-02-15T15:01:00.001+11:00

Lunch went well... very well.

Lunch went longer than my lunchbreak but it easily could have gone longer.

I am very happy this afternoon and I'm going to swim in this happiness as long as I can.

Valentines 2008

2008-02-14T20:00:00.002+11:00

I wasn't jealous of the women in the office that got their flowers. I didn't get annoyed by the coworker who complained about Valentines Day... because her boyfriend wouldn't do anything special until tonight. I was (too) jealous to see a friend's Facebook's status change to in a relationship.

The thing that got me upset today was when it was suggested a meeting be rescheduled until 1pm tomorrow.

No way!

I am not going to reschedule my lunch appointment again. I've waited long enough for this, I want to see him tomorrow.

Odd dreams

2008-02-13T21:31:00.000+11:00

I've had some weird but vivid dreams the last two nights

I woke up Tuesday morning from a dream about my wedding. I arrived at something that was a blend between a house and my high school all dressed up in a suit. Some people were leaving and commented on how good I looked on this special day.

This was when I realised it was my wedding. There were a lot of people waiting, most of whom were people I went to primary school with and haven't seen in over a decade. I don't know who the bride was, as at the moment approached, I left the church.

I had to get out of there. I couldn't marry this mystery woman. I got picked up by my family who weren't upset at all that I'd left someone at the altar. They respected my decision not to go through with it.

If I was to interpret this I'd say it's something to do with the unlikeliness I'll get married and that maybe my family will be fine with this.

This morning I woke from a dream in which I walked back into my old job late. You're late I'm told. Turns out by hours (although I left the job two years ago).

It was a floor shift and things had changed. It was a remodeled version of my usual dream version of the cinema I used to work at. There was like 12 staff also working, some people I've met since I left and who've never worked at a cinema.

But I was in charge and out of my depth. I didn't understand how things worked now. I didn't understand what should take priority.

If I was to interpret this maybe I've finally realised I can't go back to that job and as much as I liked it I've moved on. Or maybe I'm nervous about the changes in my current workplace and if I can handle those?

Lost boss

2008-02-11T19:16:00.000+11:00

I came back to work with my haircut short but nobody noticed because of my big boss.

Now when I say Big Boss, he's the boss of our area, three steps up the ladder from me, and two steps away from the highest place in the org chart you could be. But I digress.

He's only been on the scene for a couple of months and from the day he walked in the door I've been very attracted to him.

One of the things that attracted me was his long curly scruffy hair and the five-day growth.

Today the long curly hair was gone, cut very short. The beard isn't but he looks different.

I kept seeing him coming in and out of his office out of the corner of my eye, and surpressing my urge to laugh. The suit, short hair, somewhat formed beard...

He looks like Jack from Lost (mostly as seen in the off-Island moments).

I'm so tempted to make jokes about The Others.

Broadway backwards

2008-02-07T20:31:00.001+11:00

Broadway Backwards sounds and looks really interesting. I'm hoping to find the following on YouTube:

"A Boy Like That / I Have a Love" from West Side Story:

Neil Patrick Harris and his partner singing "Take me or Leave Me" from Rent:

And the male ensemble (in towels) singing "I'm Gonna Wash That Man Right Outta My Hair," from South Pacific:

Going without

2008-02-06T22:13:00.000+11:00

Although I'm pretty lapsed, I do make my parents happy by going without meat for two days a year. It's an odd superstition really but I figure what can it hurt to not eat meat two days out of the 364 this year?

Speaking of going without though the last two days I've seen men everywhere that have turned me on. The guy in the sandwich shop, the American guy on the train, the guy with glasses on the train this morning, the guy in the lift, the curly haired guy leaving my building, the guy with the waxed chest standing next to me on the train.

I think the current hopeful situation has got me thinking more from below the belt lately so I'm taking more notice than usual.

Benefits of the delay?

2008-02-05T20:04:00.000+11:00

I'm trying to put a positive spin on the delay in my head but I'm not doing a great job.

So far the best I can do is that the extra time allows me to get a haircut, buy some impressing clothes and, if I try the ozone diet ("it's air apparently") maybe I can loose a few kilos.

I am nervous that I'm not good enough for him, because I hold him in such high regard and myself much less so.

But I'm jumping ahead of myself.

I just have to wait until Friday and see how things go in person before I start assuming what he is or isn't looking for at the moment.

At the end of the day

2008-02-04T17:23:00.000+11:00

I'm levelling out.

Really it's just a temporary disappointment and I don't want it to dominate my feelings.

But it goes back to my concerns I've previously posted about how quickly I can get excited and how quickly I can crash.

I wish I had better control over that.

Lower

2008-02-04T13:39:00.000+11:00

Damn this fucking emotional rollercoaster.

The slightest sign of rejection and I'm crashing down.

I can't concentrate, I'm Mr Zero Productivity, and even the arrival of some goodies in the mail isn't making me excited like it should be.

And there's the despair and fear that while I'm making a big deal out of this when it could turn out he's as interested as he's always been; that is friend only.

This is why I knew I shouldn't let myself get too hopeful, why I had to be cautious and anticipate that I was judging the situation wrong.

I feel ridiculous: a couple of texts, some chats and a phone call is not enough to get excited about the way I have.

But I did get carried away by it and now I'm paying for it as I thought I would.

And I should be telling myself it's not the end of the world, it's just a delay... but how many times have I said that to myself in regards to him.

Maybe not

2008-02-04T10:55:00.000+11:00

Two weeks?

Waiting the weekend was bad enough but to have to wait another 12 days is going to be murder.

And I'm trying to play it cool but I really want to see him sooner.

You know sometimes I feel like I would quit my job if it meant I would have a better chance to meet guys.

That "Are you Desperate" checklist I read last night was right, but I knew that anyway.

Maybe

2008-02-03T21:56:00.000+11:00

I'm not sure how to blog about what's going on with me at the moment and am waiting to see how it's going to play out.

Generally I'm feeling quite positive and hopeful but let's see how it plays out this week.

Delay

2008-02-01T14:21:00.001+11:00

I'm trying really hard at the moment to keep my emotions level. I've been nervous, excited and now today a little disappointed by a cancellation that almost derailed me.

I had a few moments where I could see I was about to get very negative about it but I think I'm back on track now. It was a delay not a cancellation.

Running into the Runner

2008-01-30T12:51:00.000+11:00

Heading out for a coffee meeting this morning I ran into the Runner, a former coworker I had a bit of a thing for. His eyes and grin are still amazing. A little small talk before the lights changed and I crossed away from him. He still remembers me enough to stop and talk.

Seesaw

2008-01-27T19:41:00.000+11:00

I'm really concerned how delicate my emotional state can be at times.

I can interpret something as small as a single word into an expression of interest that has me skipping through the street.

But then not much time later I can take a single action to mean rejection and want to run away and hide.

I went to bed last night feeling depressed, deciding I wouldn't go to the BBQ on Monday because I couldn't cope with dealing with people and wanting instead to mope about Mr Does-he-or-doesn't-he.

After sleeping on it I've recovered somewhat and am going along, still a bit concerned about my ups and downs, but not letting my feelings stop me doing other things.

Keen much?

2008-01-26T23:38:00.001+11:00

What goes up, must come down.

When you get to the edge of the cliff - jump off, 'cause you'll always land somewhere

Stupid, stupid, stupid.

At the peak?

2008-01-25T14:28:00.000+11:00

I'm feeling good today, staying up late last night certainly paid off.

I'm trying not to make too much of what was said, but I'm thinking about it too much.

I'm nervous because while I like the view from up here, I've fallen off this mountain before.

Life on Mars

2008-01-24T16:42:00.000+11:00

If I can't find a man here then at least now I can start looking elsewhere.

It's too soon Reese!

2008-01-23T14:26:00.000+11:00

It's not even February yet and I've received two emails from online stores spruiking Valentine's Day presents.

It's bad enough the day's coming at all without being reminded more than three weeks in advance that I'm still single.

Edit: And now Apple joins the list reminding me Valentine's Day is coming.

I'm unsubscribing from all of you!

Trapped in the Closet

2008-01-22T22:23:00.000+11:00

R Kelly's Trapped in the Closet hiphopera must be one of the most bizarre things I've ever seen. Once I stumbled upon this on the music channel the other night I couldn't turn away! It just goes on and on... for 22 chapters! I never knew the R Kelly parts of the South Park episode of the same name were a parody of this film clip series. I just can't work out what he was thinking when he made this? It's not exactly radio-friendly.

Roger me, Federer

2008-01-19T23:29:00.000+11:00

After 4 and a half hours watching Roger Federer play pretty poorly, I'm exhausted! It was the most exciting game I've watched in ages but he should have been able to handle the other guy better.

Here's Roger handling another guy, Rafael Nadal (not who he played tonight).

Waiting

2008-01-18T21:37:00.000+11:00

I had a few ideas to post about today but tonight I'm just feeling kind of bleh.

I'm a bit tired, but I'm also thinking about a couple of people I know, and like, and would like to be with right now, but can't be.

I'm trying to be patient but tonight it's bringing me down.

I want to ring up X and say "do you want to grab a coffee, a beer, hangout"?

I want him to say yes because he wants to spend time with me.

But I've wanted this for years, how patient can I be?

A pause before

2008-01-17T21:16:00.000+11:00

With a drink in my hand at the farewell drinks I spoke again to the sexiest man in my office.

I realise that the only times I've chatted to him has been at drinks, so I don't know if the little pauses when he talks are related to drinking.

It's kind of endearing but at the same time I think it might get on my nerves (in the imaginary world where he's not got a partner, is gay, and is interested in me).

On the other hand the way he considers what he's going to say is kind of nicer than the babbling stream I sometimes let out.

Pretty boy

2008-01-15T21:17:00.000+11:00

It would be nice to think that I was suffering from pretty boy syndrome?

If I could convince myself that guys weren't showing interest in me because of that syndrome that might help my ego a bit.

Maybe I'm too far down the spiral "into a journey of self-doubt and a lowered sense of self-esteem"?

Walking lunch

2008-01-14T20:29:00.000+11:00

Last week a couple of the design girls sent around a walking map and encouraged everyone to join in on lunchtime walks.

I went along on the first one last week but wasn't prepared. They were all in sports gear with runners while I walked around in my shirt, pants and dress shoes.

For today's walk I was half casual, changing my shirt for a t-shirt and my shoes for runners. I feel so much more comfortable dressed like that, more like myself and not like I'm pretending to be a grow up.

The walks are a nice break to the day and since others are doing it, it helps encourage me.

It also helps me towards a couple of this year's goals: lose some weight, and be more open with the people I work with.

A couple of months of these walks and I might even open up to them all about my lonely search for a man and get some pointers towards available men.

Who do you think it is...

2008-01-13T20:01:00.000+11:00

Someone rang me early this morning, but the number was withheld so I don't know who it was, but one name went through my head....

The name of the guy I'm most interested in at the moment.

Whenever my phone rings out of the blue, or a message comes through via SMS or email don't we all hope that special person is contacting you?

Or is that just me?

In the other carriage

2008-01-10T22:33:00.000+11:00

On the train home tonight I had a good view of a guy I've seen on the train several times before. He's tall, dark haired, cute, eastern European background I'd guess.

Tonight however I glanced up from and noticed him looking back at me and not with a "what are you looking at?!" frowny look but with a "Are you looking at me?" half-smile look.

I kept glancing up and we made eye contact a couple more times. We were separated by carriages so I couldn't attempt small talk, but I felt like it.

Then I noticed a ring on one of his fingers and I always forget which is the married straight man ring finger and which is the gay ring finger.

Either way it's enough to put me off making the first move, but I will continue to smile should we board the same train again.

Trimmed

2008-01-09T14:53:00.000+11:00

I'm itching a bit in my pants at the moment, but it's not because of excitement or something I caught off a trick.

While I was away last week I took the opportunity to trim my short and curlies.

Well actually my public is hair is never all that short and it gets really bushy or long.

And when I say trim I actually mean a total trim, all the hair in what I guess you could call the underpants zone is gone, and it's felt great.

Removing the bushes makes my cock look bigger, particularly when my grower is flaccid.

And something I wasn't expecting, is that now when I touch myself, I feel like I'm holding someone else's meat and potatoes.

I'm letting some of the hair grow back in - the completely hairless look just doesn't look right - but I aim to shape the regrowth.

I want to keep a patch above my cock in true porn star style.

Office crush crushed

2008-01-08T15:07:00.000+11:00

On my first day back at work an email came around to say that Office Crush wouldn't be in.

This made me realise I hadn't given Office Crush a thought since the Christmas Party.

Although I like looking at him around the office, it was clearly an out of sight out of mind. I did think about the Sexy Boss though.

Maybe that was because he stayed longer at the Christmas Party and it was there I had my first real chat with him? Whereas Office Crush left early to do married person things.

Office Crush is back in the office today and flamboyantly displaying his heterosexuality with a new framed photo of him with his wife.

So while I think he's still alright to look at the attraction to him is almost gone, I can't really use the word crush anymore in relation to him.

Besides, there's someone else who I'm much more "crushing" on right now.

I Am Legend

2008-01-06T20:18:00.000+11:00

Some light spoilers ahead...

I think the Mutant Enemy Production's cardboard monster is probably more scarier than any of the CGI in I Am Legend. I wish movie makers wouldn't keep relying on CGI so much in horror movies when physical effects work so much better.

I think CGI can work well for some monster movies, for example I think that the bugs from Starship Troopers hold up brilliantly ten years later, but this film was just an example of where they go wrong.

Some of the CGI was really nice, I loved the coming soon movie poster that was added to Times Square for example, as well as the ruined look of Manhattan but there was more than one time that Will Smith needed to face something real.

And why did the real mistake his character made never really get acknowledged? He never seemed to realise it. I was disappointed by the ending too which reminded me of a much better film.

Back from holidays

2008-01-06T00:40:00.000+11:00

After several days away I'm back home.

I've spent the last four days down at Phillip Island. Very nice weather, a lot of quiet time to relax and chill out.

I did some man-scaping (more on that later), some man-watching (more on that later), started my new year exercise regime (inspired by the previous two items).

I didn't go in to the water, other than wading, because there was no one looking out for me, and as the ads say "you're on your own if something goes wrong"

Hopefully when I go down next year there will be someone on the sand with me.

An early new year's kiss

2007-12-31T17:39:00.000+11:00

What I'd like most in the new year...

End of 2007

2007-12-31T17:06:00.000+11:00

Wow another year over already!

I didn't meet all of my New Year's Resolutions from last year. Not sure what my new ones will be.

I definitely haven't ended the year where (and with who) that I'd hoped but I haven't given up hope.

Next year promises to be interesting. I should hopefully have a job interview early on which could bring major changes. And a long time crush has come back into my life and while I'm trying to play it cool he does make me smile.

Bring on 2008!

Hot end to the year

2007-12-29T23:00:00.000+11:00

No doubt it's summer. Despite the storms that hit in the week before Christmas today's 40 degrees has been nice, but man it's hot!

I've been overdosing on holiday movies this week which has kept me cool but hasn't helped the tan. I am on track though for a couple of days down at the beach later this week - after new years before I head back to work.

As was pointed out to me recently a search for one of Melbourne's nude beaches brings back this blog as a top result! I will not be heading to any of the official nude beaches.

A couple of years ago I was wandering along a regular but somewhat secluded beach and came across two mature gentlemen relaxing on the beach sans clothing. I had never thought of this beach as someplace that this would happen so it was a surprise.

I might visit that beach this week. I do like getting some sun all over and despite my shyness (or maybe because of it?) I do like a bit of exhibitionism. Sorry there will be no photos but here's some inspiration.

Holiday leave

2007-12-24T16:52:00.000+11:00

I probably will not be posting much in the next few weeks - I'm off from work, hoping to get out of town for a few days.

I probably wont be making any progress in the hunt for a man although who knows, maybe a recently returned friend might give me a chance for a third first date?

I hope Santa's listening. I've been a good boy.

Post-Christmas Party Wrap

2007-12-22T23:57:00.000+11:00

I think the alcohol from yesterday's Christmas party is out of my system. I don't drink much, and very rarely. Given that it was a Christmas party though I did chug back a few beers up until the point where I couldn't finish a bottle.

It was one of the better parties and I stayed late. I was there for about 8 hours which is a huge effort for me. Chatting away, having some good laughs. I took a seat away from the usual co-workers to try and mix and that worked well.

I was having fun for most of those hours although I probably could have left a little early. I'm always bad at judging when the best time to make an exit is, and the constant pouring rain outside helped keep me captive.

I didn't have any one-on-one time with the new guy I recently crushed on. I did however have one-on-one time with my sexy head boss. It was the longest conversation I've ever had with him.

I was paying very close attention and was a little annoyed that he kept mentioning a "partner" but did not use a pronoun that implied gender. The ring on his right hand confused matters a little. However the mention of children he sees part-time implies that he has had heterosexual sex on at least three occasions.

I'm not sure what I said to him (some stuff about America and the trip home last night) but I'm sure my drunken body language was screaming "I want to be yours" at him. Bad career move but if someone asked me "what's your type?" I can point to him as an example.

On best behaviour

2007-12-20T22:30:00.001+11:00

Tomorrow I have my work Christmas Party.

Hmm... the combination of alcohol and the presence of the cute straight new guy I have a crush on could be bad.

So could the combination of alcohol and the presence of the sexy new boss.

I can talk to the former who I find attractive but in my league. The latter I get all bashful around. He's also straight (I'm sure) but he's very sexy.

Storm damage

2007-12-20T21:37:00.000+11:00

Melbourne had a tropical storm today. Lightning was cracking overhead as I got to work. Our fancy new office building couldn't cope and our lights flickered off and some people's computers turned off. We wondered about the safety of the guys in the crane next door.

When I went out at lunchtime it was grey and like it was going to rain again. I came out of QV and the sun was shining and it was so hot and humid. Very uncomfortable.

Then as the afternoon went on a second stormfront approached. This time the rain hit the building hard. Most of us stopped to watch it sweep past the windows. And of course the Connex messages started coming through.

A tree fell down on the Dandenong line and at 930pm the line is still blocked. Must have been a big tree. I didn't want to face an hour delay trying to board buses on such a busy train line so I hung at work for a while.

When I left, with no update to say the line was clear I got on the Frankston line instead and arranged a pick up. About 9 stops short of that stop though the train driver came on to tell us that because a tree had fallen over the tracks the train was going to be terminating.

How do two train lines get blocked by trees on the same night? How do four hours goes buy and the line's not clear? Did they bring the power-lines down?

My trip home last night, even with the guy not looking back, was so much better.

The trip home tonight

2007-12-19T19:55:00.000+11:00

Board train

Notice guy on carriage

Think he looks nice

Actually kind of nice

No, he's quite cute

I hope he looks like my way

Hasn't looked my way yet

I don't think he's going to look my way

He's not that cute actually

Read book

Read book

Read book

Is he still on the train?

Read book

I think he was straight anyway

Cho-cho-choose

2007-12-17T09:47:00.000+11:00

Bad start to the week this morning. I was late to work because I lost my train ticket and could not find it anywhere. I had to buy another one, $10 down the drain and catch a much later train that usual.

But something lifted my mood a bit just before I got off the train. I noticed this gorgeous dark haired guy further along the train giving his blond not-as-gorgeous boyfriend a kiss goodbye before disembarking. Such a nice normal act but one I realised I've never seen before except between different sex partners.

You know how much I yearn to be half of a gay couple, and it's because of the little things like this that I feel I'm missing out on.

Christmas shopping

2007-12-15T21:59:00.000+11:00

I have to do some more Christmas shopping this weekend. Shops are crazy at the moment though. It's not worth trying to shop in the city during my lunch hour. Surely people who don't work could leave the city stores between 12 and 2 and allow the workers to shop, non-workers have all day to shop. In the same way trains are getting a bit quieter in the mornings but busier at night as shoppers join the workers on the way home at the end of the day.

I went to Fountain Gate via the new Dandenong Bypass. It does save time, making it a fifteen minute trip. I returned some library books and the Deadwood DVDs I borrowed. Then I tried the shops and although it was still early they were packed. I ran into the latter Ryan from Village at K-Mart.

Calling into JB at Dandenong wasn't the best decision but I knew what I was getting into. I got a spot, got the game I wanted and then checked out the Market while I was there. I was annoyed by the amount of Knockoffs to be found. I really should have expected it I guess.

After lunch I took my sister shopping to Knox. Really busy there but the wait for a carpark wasn't too bad. Not as bad as say Chadstone would have been. Was there for quite some time but it didn't feel that long. I was mostly do some price-checking as well as looking for a Kris Kringle present (the last buy I need to make before Christmas).

The crowds were bad but since I was only in one purchasing queue it wasn't too bad. I used a 40% off coupon to get the This Life box set from Borders. The only thing that annoyed me was the number of children just screaming as high pitched as they could. Painful!

Coming home I had trouble on Stud Road when I ended up behind a broken down and abandoned car in the right hand lane. It took a bit to get into the next lane and a bit of a risky pull out to do it. Can't believe that a police car ahead of me at the lights a few minutes before hadn't done anything. Passing the car I could see it had smashed into another car but where was that one and where was the driver?

Old school chum

2007-12-14T15:01:00.001+11:00

As much as I dislike random pokes on Facebook it is interesting to see who you can find on the site and what you can find out.

Today I was randomly throwing in some names of people I went to school with but haven't seen in years and I found an old friend, a former best friend from my grade six class.

We went to different high schools and so like almost all my primary school friendships it disappeared into the ether.

I haven't spoken to him in something like 17 years.

It surprised me to learn that this old chum is "Interested in Men".

I think it's quite fair to say that he is gay: His friends contain many other Men interested in Men. He has a Daily Hunk application.

When I knew him we were both 11. I was not consciously aware I was gay at that age, but did we know on some level and did that draw us together as friends?

How much better might high school have been had we been at the same school and/or remained friends?

Instead of coming out to a straight friend I thought was gay, I might have come out to a gay friend who was gay.

Signed in

2007-12-13T23:05:00.000+11:00

Bit of a surprise tonight to hear from a long lost voice. Just trying to not overreact. Yes my heart jumping up and down. My brain is over-thinking the implications and motives . My cock is hard. Going to have to try to keep all that under control.

Looking at Tim

2007-12-12T21:01:00.000+11:00

Despite it being the last third of the article, the headline in today's Herald Sun says: The truth about Tim. The confusing subheading says "Tim Campbell sets the record straight"

Prompted by the gossip column in the same paper, Tim has had to discuss his (homo)sexuality for the first time. Who knows why the paper took it upon themselves to out him through implication?

Tim has recently ended an 11 year relationship. That's a pretty impressive effort, more impressive than doing a waltz on Dancing with the Stars.

"If every time I'm written about now it's as 'the gay actor', it would bore the hell out of me". Sadly he probably will be, at least in the short term.

Am I bad to be more interested in him now that I know he's gay? I don't think so. There's not a lot of out gay celebrities in Australia so I think it's good to get behind them.

So to speak.

Italian tradey wanted

2007-12-11T09:28:00.000+11:00

Although I probably play with myself enough already, I am on the lookout for a good deal on a Nintendo DS Lite.

I've been tempted for a while. As much as I like the modern 3D Playstation games sometimes I just want something a bit more simpler. A good old 2D platformer.

Replaying my old SNES games on a laptop has kept me satisfied, but I want to play something I didn't clock when I was still in high-school.

What's really won me over now is finding about the ways the DS's functionality can be expanded with "Homebrew" applications.

So it looks like this Christmas I will get to play with that famous Italian plumber again.

The season to give or to receive?

2007-12-10T16:35:00.000+11:00

I'm not sitting all that comfortably today, but better than last night.

Yesterday I got my dildo out which I haven't used in a long while and gave it a ride. My body is still readjusting.

It's been over two years now since I was last penetrated (and about 18 months since I did any of that to someone else)

When I was a virgin I always thought I'd only be a top. Then in my first sexual experience I bottomed and I did that a couple of times more.

Eventually I tried being active and upto the last time I had sex (sometime last year, around May) that's all I was doing.

I list myself as versatile because I really don't have a preference. I enjoy both aspects.

Topping is just a little easier as you're not left so uncomfortable the next day.

I guess however if you regularly bottom (more than once a year) you stop even noticing it?

But if you're playing solo it's really the only game you can play.

Hopefully, I'll play with a partner soon.

Spamalot

2007-12-08T22:46:00.000+11:00

During the week I had the chance to see Spamalot on stage in Melbourne. The show was a bit disappointing.

It was funny, but the music numbers didn't really win me over. I didn't come out with the tunes in my head, but as I listen to the soundtrack it's growing on me a bit more.

The cast did a good job and were likable and watchable. I haven't seen the movie this is based on but I suspect it might be somewhat sketch-based like this show was (particularly in the ~~third~~second act). There were some very clever special effects on show and parodies of other shows.

I think maybe I've been spoilt for local productions after seeing Broadway shows on Broadway earlier this year? The audience seemed so small here and applause after each number seemed muted.

It did seem to me that there were a few gay men in the audience, but then anytime I see two men together my first assumption is that they are a gay couple!

Seeing some of the cast leaving while I was waiting for my ride home I'm pretty sure there were some on stage too. One in particular looked surprisingly much more attractive out of costume.

Return to Rio

2007-12-04T23:04:00.000+11:00

Something to lighten my day: there's a new Fifi Box Rio ad with the multipack hunk back and looking even cuter. More pics to come but what's his name?

Not dumped, just ignored?

2007-12-04T16:46:00.001+11:00

My use of the word "dumped" in the last post clearly showed my ignorance when it comes to dating and the dating lingo.

I freely admit that when it comes to dating I am about on par with the average 15 year old.

My understanding is that at the end of a first date one (or both) parties might feel that there is no spark and that a second date will not occur.

A "we'll talk tomorrow" comment from the other part should not necessarily be taken as a promise.

Due to social nicety, this is often left unsaid at the time and may only be discovered when the next request for a date is replied to with a no (either verbal or by no response).

However should the other party indeed talk to the first party the next day, and the day following, is it not conceivable that further interaction would occur?

Or is it common for guys to respond to text messages from someone they are not interested in for two days and just string them along?

Does a message asking "hows your day going?" really sound that desperate that it's the final straw?

Downpour

2007-12-03T19:53:00.000+11:00

It wasn't just outside today that people were getting wet. The last two friends who tried to talk to me got rained on by my own grey cloud.

I'm carrying quite a bit of anger at the moment over last week.

I'm not even that upset that the guy dumped me, I'm just mad that he didn't have the guts to actually tell me that or to say anything to me at all.

I really can't get over that cowardly act or how stupid I was to not trust my initial judgment of "not sure". I guess I just wanted someone to show an interest after so long.

Time for the sun to come out now and burn this guy from my memory the way he already discarded me from his.

Movies to watch

2007-12-02T20:36:00.000+11:00

I went shopping this morning but it was so hot driving around so I wasn't out long.

I tried to read this afternoon but my book was slipping out of my sweaty hands. I tried using the computer but the laptop's too warm in my lap.

So what to do?

The answer came when I found Foxtel have given me short-term access to some of the movie channels! I'm just going to lay back and watch the TV screen until I slip off to bed.

The Summer of Paul

2007-12-01T22:17:00.000+11:00

The Spring Awakening is over -- ending on the same day I realise that the first guy I've gone out on a date with in a very long is another jerk who resorts to silence instead of saying "I'm not interested" *.

And so The Summer of Paul has started today.

Summer can be a bad time to meet guys. December is full of Christmas celebrations. News Years is a lot of Pressure for a new relationship. And summer ends with Valentines Day which is even more.

Still I would prefer it to be a summer that's not totally solo.

* If he does make contact with a reasonable excuse I'll accept it, but otherwise he's on my "naughty" list.

Clearly no response

2007-11-30T22:05:00.000+11:00

So I've got no response in four days. I'm going to take that as a sign of disinterest.

I don't care how busy someone is, you can always find a couple of minutes to send an sms to someone you're interested in.

Oh well, moving on then I guess. Anyone want a date this weekend? The link to my contact details and profiles is over there.

I'd like to keep the momentum going into summer after such a long dating drought all year.

Paul Up Early

2007-11-29T20:29:00.000+11:00

Instead of being Up Late this morning I was Up early. I woke up at 5:30 in order to go to an industry breakfast we were hosting this morning. I do not want to have to get up that early very often. The trip in was fine and pretty quick in a taxi.

Handing out the name tags was kind of fun. I miss my customer service work. I handed one to a guy I'd seen before at work but didn't recognise him. He definitely looked better last time but maybe that was because of the couple of drinks I had on that occasion.

Who was looking good however were a couple of the waiters. Tall, slim, young-twenties guys with dark floppy hair. Very nice to watch walking by.

What it looks like

2007-11-28T21:40:00.000+11:00

If I took a step back and looked at things since Saturday night I might notice a pattern that I've seen before. This might lead me to further proof for a couple of my beliefs. But I'm trying not to jump to those conclusions just yet.

Date recap

2007-11-26T20:13:00.000+11:00

The appearance of a new guy at work a few weeks ago started my engine going. Asking him to lunch got me on the road. And although that particular road was a deadend, now that my wheels were spinning I was eager to keep them moving.

Hence when someone started messaging me I decided to give him a go and after a week of emails and text messages we went out on Saturday night.

It was nice. We ate at a butch restaurant that we laughed at, saw a crappy movie which we joked about, and watched some of the election coverage and some of ESB. It was nice and he seems like a good guy but it was missing something.

I didn't get that gut feeling I did with the Super guy, I didn't feel the buzz I did with The Whiz.

When I was sitting next to my work crush today at a boring seminar I felt a powerful lust I just didn't feel with my weekend date, although I tried.

I'm going to see him again (well if he wants to) to give it another chance.

I realise that part of the reason to go back is because I'm scared this might be it so I need to try hard. Just in case. I also think

If there's no click I think I'm better off repositioning him as a potential friend (not that I'm good at having gay friends) rather than as a potential boyfriend.

Vote counting

2007-11-23T22:41:00.001+11:00

Tomorrow night three of the five major television networks will be busy covering the count of votes to see who will lead the country.

I won't be watching.

I have a date.

Go me!

David's not boverred

2007-11-23T00:39:00.001+11:00

Not quite the thing I usually post but:
a) David Tennant is cute
b) Catherine Tate is funny
c) and this is the funniest thing I've seen all week

Edit:

But it's been pulled from YouTube! I'm glad I saved a copy locally. I've been laughing at it over and over.

"Is this double English or is this double Scotish?"

Thinking this way and that

2007-11-21T23:18:00.000+11:00

My feelings for the new guy in the office keep changing rapidly. Sometimes I'm annoyed at him for not being what I hoped. Sometimes I wonder if he's in denial. Sometimes I wonder if I got it wrong and he is gay. Sometimes I wonder if I could turn him. Sometimes I hope I can just get past it and that he could still be a friend in the office.

Been on leave?

2007-11-20T21:34:00.000+11:00

I put my foot in it today while trying to make jokey small talk in the lift this morning.

How was I to know he'd been away because of a funeral.

Cue the Curb Your Enthusiasm music.

You have three friend requests

2007-11-19T10:04:00.001+11:00

I made a few comments about Facebook last week and it seems like people are trying to test me out.

I've had two friend requests and one poke from three total strangers. What do they have in common? All gay.

No message, no "hello", no "I'd like to be friends with you because..." just random clicks.

And what exactly is a "poke" anyway?

Sorry guys my personal facebook is for people I know.

If you want to add me to your list of friends you can do it on myspace or gaywatch where I don't share my personal information and accept all requests.

If you want to talk to me, send me a message. There's an email link to the side, plus you can contact me through my journal, or gaydar, or myspace.

A quick week

2007-11-16T22:35:00.000+11:00

At the start of the week it felt like this week was going to go forever. But, even with a bit of sickness, it feels like it went pretty fast.

We had a goodbye lunch today that I felt a bit flat at but it was followed by farewell drinks which went much better. I was louder than usual, helped by the selection of people and the acoustics in the "nightclub" (I prefer calling it "diary room" but I don't think that will catch on).

The crush wasn't there either making me feel self-conscious.

It's got really hot too. This weekend would have been a nice one to head down to the island but I haven't planned well enough.

I did some shopping tonight, watched an excellent episode of The Office and despite the heat feel like catching up on some sleep with an early night. I slept in a bit this morning so I think I could use a few good zzzs.

No mo

2007-11-14T20:33:00.000+11:00

"Movember" might be raising money for some good causes, but a lot of guys don't look good with a moustache.

In general I don't give guys with a moustache (or beard) a second look. Stubble's not too bad but I prefer clean-shaven given a choice. Facial hair ages a man too much.

At the moment there's a few guys at work who have gone past stubble but who's facial hair isn't long enough to be a true moustache or beard and they just look... wrong.

Even the newest cutest guy in the place just looks like he needs a shave.

Sneezing

2007-11-12T20:50:00.000+11:00

Last week's emotional upheaval has impacted on my health with wheezing on Friday persisting into a mild cold last night that's keeping me using the tissues tonight.

The stress of being single works against me. Even while I'm checking out guys on the walk to work today I realise how unattractive I look all pale and dripping nose.

I really have trouble controlling my emotions. It's full speed all the time either on the way up when I think there's a potential and all the way down when I find it's just in my head.

And a postscript to this week's crush

2007-11-08T21:12:00.000+11:00

The doubts I had yesterday about the guy at work being the same guy I saw on gaydar were clearly proven correct today.

I am now considering messaging the guy on gaydar anyway because I did like the look and the profile of that guy too.

Composed

2007-11-08T14:00:00.000+11:00

Seeing the ring really shook me. I was feeling pretty crappy after that and just wanted to run away and hide.

But where was that going to get me?

I wanted to get a proper answer to my questions of his sexuality and I wanted to do what I had thought last night of doing but was now chickening out on.

So I summoned up some courage, walked on over, and asked him to lunch.

We went and ate and talked about work, the office, previous work, travel to the office, and travel abroad.

Any doubts about his relationship status started to disappear after quite a few uses of the term "we", and then vanished altogether when he said "my wife".

Beg forgiveness for the stereotypes, but I swear he's looks, sounds and acts totally gay.

But then it wouldn't be the first time a gay-acting coworker was straight. Wouldn't even be the second time. It wouldn't even be the third time!

Now: I feel better with myself as I managed to go through with asking him for lunch. I do feel a bit foolish for crushing so hard.

It also reinforces to me that I don't want a friend, or rather perhaps, I won't be happy with just a friend.

Ring

2007-11-08T11:10:00.001+11:00

What does it mean when a guy has a ring on the ring finger of his left hand?

What else can it mean but he's taken.

Really, who was I kidding other than myself? And in so many ways.

Even when I knew to be cautious I let hope get in the way of common sense.

Anyone got some Bindeez they can give me to play with? I want to feel something else right now.

Facebook etiquette

2007-11-07T22:28:00.000+11:00

I had another random request on Facebook to be someone's friend. Another total stranger.

At least this time a quick look at his friend list showed me why he'd added me. All of his other friends were young good looking men.

To a degree I'm kind of flattered that he thought my crappy Facebook photo was "cute" enough to go on a friends list with some very good looking guys, but I declined the request.

My official Facebook friendship rules

1. If you went to school, worked with, or have otherwise met me and you add me I will accept the request.

2. If you're someone I'd stop and talk to if I saw you out and about, I will add you and probably already have.

3. If you're randomly picking strangers to add to your friendlist I will not add you.

Another view

2007-11-06T20:37:00.000+11:00

Tomorrow I'm hoping I can get someone else's opinion on the new ~~gay~~ guy in the office.

I hate not having peers that can give me advice on things like this. I've got no one to talk to other than this blog, and I'm not too keen to take just my own advice.

Best approach

2007-11-05T18:23:00.000+11:00

I think the new guy at work is on gaydar with a profile that shows we could be pretty compatible. Not 100% sure it's him, but fairly sure.

Even more sure that the guy in my office is gay but he's only been there two days and I don't know if he's out or has discussed this with anyone. And really you probably wouldn't in the first two days.

So how to approach him? I have had a few words but our work is not likely to cross paths that much.

I could message him online and say hi. I'm not liking that idea much for fear it looks like stalking(!) even though I found the profile completely by accident.

I think an in person chat would be a better way to do it. I could go over and make small talk? This would be fairly easy: how are you settling in, where'd you work previously, etc.

I was even thinking I could ask him if he was married or had children and when the answer was a (sure to be) no, I could mention how relieved I am that there's finally another guy in the office who isn't. (Which I am).

Across the Universe trailer - I've just seen a face

2007-11-04T09:31:00.000+11:00

Across the Universe

2007-11-03T20:46:00.000+11:00

Two weeks ago when I saw Year of the Dog there was a preview for a 60's period film about an American guy, his best friend from England who falls for his sister, and the inevitable draft to the Vietnam war. Looked like a familiar story until the trailer became an all-singing all-dancing affair by the end.

I went and saw it this morning and absolutely loved it. Sorry Hairspray this is the movie musical of the year. All the songs are Beatles songs mixed into the dialogue very nicely (although things get a bit fruity when some of the Beatles' more drug-referencing songs get a play). The makers of 'Viva Laughlin' should have seen this film as an example of the proper way to use known songs to progress plot and establish character.

I have to get the soundtrack. Never been a Beatles fan, but I loved most of the songs and the performances of them. I never realised how powerfully romantically longing "I Wanna Hold Your Hand" could be.

The dance performances had some fantastic moments: dancing gridiron players, a dance of office workers walking the streets, the dancing on water.

And the two male leads, gorgeous, particularly Jim Sturgess as Jude.

Match the face

2007-11-03T00:06:00.000+11:00

It was a very short day in the office today, but my eye was often drawn to the new guy. I kept trying to match him to the gaydar pictures I saw and there is a similarity but I'm not yet 100% sure that they are the same person.

The more I look at him thought the more I think he's gay but I wonder if that's my assumption colouring the view?

I also am thinking he's too attractive for me, but we could be friends. The idea of having a true peer in the workplace sounds really good.

I've already been mixing a bit more around the office trying to make a good impression in his peripheral vision and it has made me in more like I fit in than normal.

Found?

2007-11-01T23:57:00.000+11:00

... and I think I just found his gaydar profile.

Oh my god.

This kind of makes it harder: "i browsed your profile on gaydar last night" doesn't really flow into conversation all that easily in the office.

All Hallows

2007-11-01T13:42:00.000+11:00

I don't know if I should thank Jack Skellington or whatever other being looks over the world on Halloween, but someone was listening to my woes last night and acted on them.

A new guy started at work today and I am totally attracted to him. I don't know know much about him yet other than his job and name, but he's very nice to look at and I get more of a gay vibe than a straight vibe from him.

I am keen to get to know him a bit better and see if my intuition is correct.

I will be attempting to learn more. In an office full of (mostly attached) women it's nice to get a guy coming in many more than a second glance.

Halloween

2007-10-31T23:45:00.001+11:00

On this Halloween night, I think of ghosts, vampires, zombies, werewolves, and other creatures of the night and realise they don't scare me half as much as another year alone.

Two months left of the year doesn't give me much time left to make 2007 the year I see out with someone.

That is far more scary.

Who's that on Facebook?

2007-10-30T22:38:00.000+11:00

I've had my first friend request from a total stranger. I can't work out why this guy has added me. My profile's not public (I don't think). He's not on the friend's lists of anyone I know. He's no one I recongise, nor do I recongise anyone on his friends list (except some famous politicans). I think he might be picking people as part of a election campaign given the political slant to the profile. I'm happy to hear from old school friends and coworkers, but not strangers.

Out of synch

2007-10-28T21:48:00.000+11:00

Today's been an odd day. I think the daylight savings gap hour has shunted me into another world, one an hour off of the real world.

I've been making mistakes, driven all over the city, visiting the ghostly empty office, unable to make up mind on what to buy, had a shopgirl complaining about her husband to me while buying a self-help book, breaking my own promises, been given the evil eye by an odd old woman, ignoring what fate was trying to show me, and maybe being bitten on the butt by what goes around comes around.

How many months is it until the real world comes back?

Go slow

2007-10-27T23:27:00.000+10:00

After burning through our download limit too quickly last month my sister and I upgraded the plan. And we've already used it all up.

Dial up Internet is painful. I usually have windows open all over the place but I'm having to narrow my focus to one thing at a time.

The only reason we go through so much bandwidth is televison downloads. Hour long episodes of The Office and the MTV broadcast of Legally Blonde the musical haven't helped this month.

What's worse is there is still two weeks until the Net speeds up again. I wonder if there's a truly unlimited download plan out there somewhere?

Looking at Charlie

2007-10-25T20:11:00.000+10:00

When I saw Stardust on Sunday I was totally taken by Charlie Cox.

Inspired by him I'm kind of thinking again of growing my hair long.... except I think it works on a movie star in a fantastic-historical setting. Not so much in modern day life.

But man it looked good on Charlie.

Off the saddle

2007-10-24T23:13:00.000+10:00

Almost fell off the bike at spin class tonight. About a third of the way through class and I couldn't go on. I felt like I was going to be sick, I felt light-headed.

I needed to take a seat and a bit of a lay down but I couldn't go on. I came home and was told I looked pale. After a shower and some food I feel better but still a bit shaky.

And I've been good this week, going to bed early and getting more sleep.

I blame the bike. They had all been serviced and the resistance was very strong at the lowest settings. I think I misjudged how hard I was working, and with a two week break it was too much for me tonight.

Viva gone

2007-10-23T20:46:00.000+10:00

Viva Laughlin has been cancelled after just two episodes screen in the US. Apparently the ratings here weren't great either, and with the way Channel Nine has been ditching shows on Monday nights it probably won't last long. Maybe they will try ER The Next Generation again?

I didn't mind the show last night. I was disappointed the singing was over real songs - creating an effect something like singing along to the radio. It wasn't great but it was just the pilot so I'm willing to give it another shot. It was not the worst show ever as some critics are saying.

I felt sorry for D.B. Woodside, demoted from President of the United States last season on 24 to bodyguard/assistant in this show.

Every two years

2007-10-23T16:17:00.000+10:00

I look for patterns even when they are not there. The latest pattern is one I'm hoping has some credence to it.

In 2001 there was a guy, a man in Japan, with whom I was spending time and who made me feel happy and less lonely

In 2003 there was a guy, a coworker, with whom I was spending time and who made me happy, less lonely at work and inspired me to come out

In 2005 there was a guy, a Whiz, who I spent brief but intense time with, who made me happy, with whom I came closest to having a relationship

So the question now is: where's the 2007 guy?

I didn't meet the Whiz until very late in '05 so there's still time.

But as another year of singledom gets closer to the end I am getting a bit anxious.

One step at a time

2007-10-22T22:14:00.001+10:00

If I had to describe myself in one word, the word is no longer "sad".

I'm not sure when this change happened but I noticed it today when I wondered what the word would be.

The answer I came up with was "lonely".

...

I do consider it progress though, that sadness is not my current defining characteristic.

Chasing Stardust

2007-10-21T20:01:00.000+10:00

I cut it a bit fine to get to the movies today, really misjudged the time it would take to get to Camberwell. Then as I'm pulling into a carpark I hit the car in front. Embarrassing enough but the car owners were still in it. They had a huge 4WD and the back of their car was taking up a could deal of the space I wanted, hence the misjudgement. All that happened was my licence plate got a little dinted by their tow bar.

I backed out and got another spot and then found I had no change to pay for a parking ticket, so I had to find another spot. I got to the cinema and found a slow moving queue but it all timed nicely and I walked in as the film, Stardust, was starting. Except the film starts with pretty much a pitch black scene so it was hard to see where other people were sitting and choose a seat.

I enjoyed the film, some of it quite familiar from the book but a lot I had forgotten. Claire Danes was beautiful but Charlie Cox? Gorgeous. It's been a while since I've been so captivated by a new guy on the big screen.

I needed my jacket in the cinema but once outside the day was hot. It was a nice warmth except for in the car where it was way too hot. I didn't end up chilling out anywhere, other than home.

Where to go on a sunny Sunday

2007-10-20T21:40:00.000+10:00

I'm going out tomorrow and would like to go somewhere where my odds of meeting a guy increase. I've got no idea where to go. I wouldn't mind a cafe or something like that but I don't know any good ones. I have to find one I like enough to go back to so I might attract someone's notice as a regular.

Back on screen

2007-10-20T21:39:00.000+10:00

I'm making up for a few weeks off by seeing a couple of movies this weekend.

Last night I watched Cabin Fever on TV. I missed the start and wonder if I needed to see it to understand the perplexing ending.

This morning I saw "Ratatouille" which I enjoyed. It was a good story, funny (not overly but some big laugh out loud moments), and superbly animated. There was one shot of Paris in particular(it comes after an arguement in the rain) that I would swear was real life. Overall, while I didn't love this as much as some other Pixar films, it was a quality film.

This afternoon I saw The Year of the Dog. It was a bit bleak and my heart went out to Molly Shannon's character whose life was falling apart even as she found a way to make her life start happening. There were interesting comments above love at the end that have me still going over them in my head. Not really something that needs to be seen on the big screen, but also not something I'd probably watch again.

Looking forward to the weekend

2007-10-18T20:39:00.000+10:00

Four days into the week and I'm still tired from the weekend. I didn't get a sleep in either day and I rely on that to catch up since I only get about 7 hours a weeknight.

Each day it's been harder and harder to get up. Only one more day and I can sleep in which will be great. I must go to the movies this weekend. I haven't gone in ages (been avoiding because of the school holidays) but there's a lot of movies I want to see. Year of the Dog is currently highest on the list as I love-love-loved the writer's The Good Girl and the themes of this new movie also resonate with me.

Tomorrow night though I will get a chance to watch all of the televised version of Legally Blonde but I've been watching bits and pieces of it and it's great. The bimbo hosts with their monotone Paris Hilton wannabe delivery do need to be snipped out however.

Ohmygod you guys

2007-10-16T14:43:00.000+10:00

I just found out that Legally Blonde (The Muscial) was filmed and shown on television in the US. That was one of my favourite Broadways shows that I saw back in May.

I've been listening to the soundtrack a lot - it's been the most played album since I got it - and have posted parts of the lyrics here before.

I so need to track down a copy of the show since it's unlikely to come on TV here.

Here's the second half of the opening number "Omigod You Guys":

More show highlights, including the fantastic first act closer "So Much Better" can be seen on YouTube.

Looking online, again

2007-10-15T21:38:00.000+10:00

Tonight I've committed myself to several more months membership for a online personals site. I was thinking about it for a while and since my dating life recently has been pretty much non-existent I thought it might help a little bit.

Last time I signed up I met a fantastic guy within a few weeks. Fingers crossed the same thing happens this time.

Facebook

2007-10-15T11:32:00.001+10:00

After watching this Video I'm thinking I might not need my Facebook account.

It does raise some interesting points about the data has on people and the fine print in their terms of use and privacy statement.

Romped out

2007-10-14T21:55:00.000+10:00

I am rather tired today after several hours walking around the city as part of the "Melbourne City Romp".

The Romp was a four hour event in which clues (and map grid references) lead each team to checkpoints where there were multiple choice questions to answer.

It was part treasure hunt, part Amazing Race, and open to all ages. No running aloud but there was still dramas.

The system was supposed to work by texting answers but it seems their system couldn't cope. We got only a few of the automated confirmation messages so it quickly became clear there was no way we'd win, but it didn't mean we couldn't have fun.

The biggest problem was the first compulsory checkpoint for my team was given the wrong grid reference. We spent over half an hour looking for a building several blocks away from where it was. All teams were notified it was a typo later but it was a severe time penalty.

Clues to locations were pretty easy, and the questions weren't too hard... that is if you could find the answers. We gave up on finding why the lakes at the old Exhibition Centre were originally installed or where the old hitching post was at the Treasury Gardens.

Lots of people were participating and the city was pretty bustling.

Despite some stress early on, I found the whole thing a whole lot of fun.

It kind of reminded me of my time on holidays in both Sydney and overseas where I have spent hours walking around foreign cities.

Armageddon out there

2007-10-13T21:35:00.001+10:00

Today I went to the Armageddon Expo in Melbourne.

The organisers need to work on some of their staging and arranging for future versions. Although a lot of the big names on their flyers were no-shows, they did get some good guests in.

Two last minute additions were Alan Tudyk and Connor Trinneer; both of whom would have brought in more dedicated sci-fi fans if they'd been advertised earlier (although there was a big crowd anyway).

I was interested in seeing Connor (who came right of the plane) as he's one of the cutest cast members from Star Trek. Shame that cute accent the character has was put on, although his normal American accent was still cute.

Also spunky was Rino Romano, the voice actor who plays the lead character in the (rather poor) new cartoon The Batman.

And while not hot, Billy West was a great guest and pretty damn funny. He's best known for his roles in Futurama, including my favourite character Dr Zoidberg.

I didn't wait in the long queues for autographs or photos. I came home with some purchases: cheap Buffy and Faith action figures, a cheap trading card set, and a Japanese photo book.

I didn't think I'd spend all that much time there but was there most of the day. I went with one of my newer hobby-based friends, and we met another there later and it was better than going alone.

There were also quite a few attractively-geeky guys worth checking out amongst the crowd.

Thataway

2007-10-12T09:21:00.000+10:00

To the really cute guy with the (English?) accent that asked me for directions this morning.

The one I helped find La Trobe Street.

I hope you found the destination you were looking for, And if you need anyone to guide you around town let me know.

I might have said this to you in person had I not been taken aback when the cute guy I was looking at actually came over to talk to me.

Viva Laughlin

2007-10-11T12:22:00.000+10:00

The new series Viva Laughlin is premiering on Nine on Monday 22 October.

I never saw the original BBC it's based on (although it starred David Tennant so I wouldn't mind) so why I am keen to see this one?

Three reasons: 1. musical numbers are performed through the episodes 2. Hugh Jackman is a regular character 3. Hugh Jackman performs musical numbers.

Sore in the saddle

2007-10-11T12:04:00.001+10:00

My behind is a little sore today after last night's spin class. I wasn't really in the mood to go but after cakes at work for three women born on the same date I felt like I had to. I think I might have had the seat too far forward though.

Pardon me, I'm changing

2007-10-10T23:17:00.000+10:00

I'm in the process of changing the focus of this blog. Instead of just posting about men and lack of them in my life, I'm going to post about all the things I like and am interested in.

It's all about trying to find some balance.

There will still be men, but it is now a safe for work blog, unless you look through the archives.

House series four

2007-10-10T23:14:00.000+10:00

The new series of House has got off to a really good start. The shake up of losing half the cast has made for some great episodes. The show does get rather forumaltic but the ongoing story lines (such as the arc with Chi McBride or the one with David Morse) make the show shine. Seeing House have to deal without his team, and this week trying to break in a new one, has been very good. Hugh Laurie's House is one of the most interesting characters on TV.

Slow mail

2007-10-10T23:13:00.000+10:00

About a month ago I made my most expensive ever purchase on eBay in order to get a set of exclusive action figures from a convention in America earlier this year.

It was only my sixth ever buy from eBay. I'm a bit of late starter but I have been getting into the hang of it.

It was a good value purchase but I was starting to get really worried it wasn't going to show up when the weeks kept going by and it wasn't in my post office box.

Yesterday I thought enough's enough and I sent an email to the seller asking, in the most polite way I could, where is it?

I got a fast response (good sign) explaining that it had been rejected by customs due to an incomplete form but had been resent a week and a half ago and was due to arrive here in ten days.

I go this morning and sure enough there it is! And I'm very happy with the items.

It's kind of addictive to browse eBay and I have tried to space out buying things to one a week.

I had stopped though due to the concern over this purchase, but I'm feeling good about it again and am going to start some more browsing tonight.

Under redevelopment

2007-10-10T11:31:00.000+10:00

Excuse the mess. Retooling works are underway. Things might get a bit rocky.

All off?

2007-10-09T21:39:00.000+10:00

There was a story in the MX newspaper tonight claiming that manzilians are becomming popular among Aussie men.

A Manzilian is the male equivalent of a female's Brazilian wax - the complete removal of pubic hair.

Seems guys are going a bit further than a back, crack and sack these days.

I don't see the appeal of a complete removal, trimmed is fine but I want to see some hair there.

I tried it once during my teenage years, shaving everything off, but the regrowth was so itchy I never tried a complete removal again.

I think it's funny that there's some debate over where it should be called a Manzilian or a Brozilian. It makes me think of the classic Manseirre/Bro debate from Seinfeld.